Friday, 12 September, 1828

I do not know how my feelings would be did I move in a sphere of competence, under my constantly increasing business, I am so fatigued from constant motion on horseback and no time for rest that I feel disagreeable. But I will not complain. I came home just at sundown, and was immediately requested to see Mr. Wm. A. Lash. I found him evidently attracted with a severe intermittent fever. He had before I came (and was under the operation of Antemomal wine) taken an emetic. I soon discovered the nature of the man under pain, restless and sullen, unpleasant in every particular, finding fault with everything not in accordance with his feelings. I commenced giving him medicine with full confidence of success in a few days. But every time an exacerbation returned, he became vexed and would not lie still one moment. And all his connections standing round him, whispering in loud whispers, that Billy would not get over it. Poor boy, how he does suffer; it is shocking. The first thing you could hear in the morning and the last in the evening would be someone of his connections, How is Billy? Is he better or not? I am afraid he will never get up again. When the fact was he never had a dangerous symptom about him. I was asked every day and sometimes fifteen times in one hour, what I though of him, and my reply invariably was that he will get well. But all would not do. Shuman must be sent for. I was consulted and, of course, had no objections. Well, he came and could find nothing amiss, but said as he once had a running sore, and that had healed up it would be advisable to make one as soon as practicable. I had little faith in its being of any utility, but had not the least objections of its being done. He accordingly burned his arm with a hot dollar and went to bed. This again produced a dissatisfaction with Shuman, but they never dare say one word to him. Oh, poor Billy, how he is tormented, could be heard from every quarter. I did not know what to think of all this excitement in his favor, Why is he any better that he should not have to suffer as any other individual; is not pain as tormenting to other people, and many a one, endures double the severity he does, with scarcely a groan. No, it is not the pain, but his disposition, his avaricious craving, because he cannot always be well to take advantage of everything that happens.